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Profession Jokes > Waiter Waiter Jokes

  • Waiter, there's a flea in my soup!
    I'll tell him to hop it.
  • Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?
    Looks like the breast-stroke to me, sir.
  • Waiter, my plate's wet!
    That's not wet, sir - that's the soup!
  • Waiter, send the chef here. I wish to complain about this disgusting meal.
    I afraid you'll have to wait, sir. He's just popped out for his dinner.
  • Waiter, do you call this a three-course meal?
    That's right, sir. Two chips and a pea.
  • Waiter, this soup tastes funny?
    So why don't you laugh?
  • Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.
    What do you expect for $1 - a live one?
  • Waiter, there's a bird in my soup.
    That's all right, sir. It's bird's nest soup.
  • Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
    Yes sir, they're not very good swimmers.
  • Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
    Well, keep quiet about it or everyone will want one...
  • Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud!
    I'm not surprised, sir, it was ground only a few minutes ago.
  • Waiter, this coffee tastes like soap.
    Then that must be tea, sir. The coffee tastes like glue.
  • Waiter, this coffee is way too strong!
    Don't complain, sir. You may be old and weak yourself some day.
  • Waiter, your tie is in my soup!
    That's all right, sir, it's not shrinkable.
  • Waiter, your thumb's in my soup!
    That's all right, sir, it's not hot.
  • Waiter, what's this in my soup?
    I'm not sure, sir, I can't tell one bug from another.
  • Waiter, do you serve crabs?
    Sit down, sir - we serve anyone.
  • Waiter, have you got asparagus?
    We don't serve sparrers and my name is not Gus!
  • Waiter, why have you given me my dinner in a feedbag?
    The head waiter says you eat like a horse.
  • Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
    Yes, sir, it's the hot water that kills them.
  • Waiter, this bun tastes of soap.
    That's right, sir - it's a bathbun.
  • Waiter, there's a twig in my soup.
    Yes, sir, we've got branches everywhere.

More Waiter Waiter Jokes ==> Page  1     

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    Last Updated April 1, 2013

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