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Transportation Jokes > Bicycle Jokes and Cycling Jokes.
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A tandem rider is stopped by a police car.
"What've I done, officer?" asks the rider.
"Perhaps you didn't notice sir, but your wife fell off your bike half a mile back . . ."
"Oh, thank God for that," says the rider - "I thought I'd gone deaf!"
A man on a bike, carrying two sacks on his shoulders, was stopped by a guard while crossing the US-Mexican border.
"What's in the bags?" asked the guard.
"Sand," the cyclist replied.
"Get them off. We need to take a look."
The guard emptied the bags and found out they contained nothing but sand. The man reloaded his bags and continued across the border. A week later, the same man was crossing again with two more bags. The guard demanded to see them, and again they contained nothing but sand. This continued every week for six months, until one day the cyclist failed to appear. A few days later, that same guard ran into the cyclist in the city.
"Hey, where have you been?" the guard asked. "You sure had us wondering! We knew you were smuggling something across the border. So tell me and I won't say a word. What was it?"
The man smiled and told him the truth. "Bicycles!"
Tough Climb for a Tandem Team
Jack and Jill have just climbed Le Alp de Huez, one of the steepest peaks in the Alps on their tandem.
"Phew, that was a tough climb" said Jill, leaning over, breathing hard. "That climb was so hard, and we were going so slow, I thought we were never going to make it."
"Yeah, good thing I kept the brakes on," said Jack, "or we'd have slid all the way back down!"
The other day on a ride, I was speeding down a narrow, twisting, mountain road. Then along comes a man who was driving very slowly uphill toward me, honking his horn and shouting at me.
"PIG! PIG!!" he yelled. "PIG! PIG!!"
So I shouted back some things I dare not repeat as I buzzed by him.
Still thinking about this awful man and his shouting, I turned the corner and promptly collided with a pig.
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Last Updated April 1, 2013
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