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The Best Your Momma Jokes

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Your Mama Jokes

For years people have been entertaining each other with Your Mama Jokes. Dear old mom seems to be easy to make fun of. Yet, they’re meant to enjoy, not as an insult but a funny way of reflection on your mum.

Our delightful collection below of Your Mama Jokes is a tribute to that wonderful woman we all love and adore. From fat jokes to those about her intelligence, they cover every subject under the sun. Enjoy and please feel free to write down any you find most pleasurable!


115 Side Splitting “Yo Mama” Jokes

Top Ten Your mama Jokes

1. “Your mama so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.”

2. “Your mama so stupid, I said kool-aid and she jumped through the wall.”

3. “Your mama’s so ugly, she threw a boomerang and it refused to come back.”

4. “Your mama so old her birth certificate says expired.”

5. “Your mama so fat she got arrested at the airport for having ten pounds of crack.”

6. “Your mama’s so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.”

7. “Your mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized.”

8. “Your mama’s so ugly, her portraits hang themselves.”

9. “Your mama so fat she’s got more Chins than a Hong Kong phone book.”

10. “Your mama is so dumb when she opened her phone and it said Sprint and she started running.”

Your Mama So Dumb Jokes

11. “Your Momma’s so dumb that when I told her it was chilly outside, she went and got a bowl.”

12. “Your Momma is so dumb she bought tickets to Xbox Live.”

13. “Your momma so dumb when I said, “Drinks on the house,” she got a ladder.”!”

14. “Your mama so dumb she got hit by a cup and told the police she got mugged.”

15. “Your momma is so dumb, she thought a kernel panic was a KFC that was out of chicken.”

16. “Your mama so dumb she got locked in a grocery store and starved!”

17. “Your momma so dumb she threw a ball at the ground and missed.”

18. “Your mama so dumb she thinks Fleetwood Mac is a new hamburger at McDonald’s!”

19. “Your momma is so dumb she tripped over a cordless phone.”

20. “Your mama’s so dumb she wore a coat to Dairy Queen because of all the blizzards.”

21. “Your momma’s so dumb when y’all were driving to Disneyland, she saw a sign that said “Disneyland left,” so she went home.”

22. “Your mama so dumb she sprayed a tree with Axe body spray and thought it would fall down.”

23. “Your momma is so dumb when someone asked her what the capital of Canada was she answered, “C.”

24. “Your mama so dumb she tried to climb mountain dew.”

25. “Your momma’s so dumb, the psychic hotline only charges her half price to read her mind!”

26. “Your mama is so dumb not even Google could translate her.”

27. “Your momma’s so dumb, it takes her an hour and a half to make minute rice.”

28. “Your mamma so dumb that when she had to leave a voicemail she walked all the way to my house and screamed in my mailbox.”

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29. “Your mama so dumb she went to the dentist to get a Bluetooth.”

30. “Your mama is so dumb she cut open a pineapple and said, “Spongebob where are you?”

31. “Your mama so dumb she thinks menopause is a button on a VCR.”

32. “Your Mamma so dumb, she thought Spotify was a stain remover!”

33. “Your Mama is so dumb, she thought a quarterback was an ATM.”

34. “Your momma so dumb I peed in the snow she pick it up and thought it was a snow cone.”

35. “Your mama so dumb that I said check out this cool new website and she got a broom and said wheres the spider.”

Your Mama is So Fat Jokes

36. ​”Your mama so fat she jumped up and got stuck in the air.”

37. ​”Your mama so fat her nose can’t even run.”

38. “​Your mama so fat, when her beeper goes off people, think she’s backing up.”

39. “​Your mama so fat that when she sends me nudes, my phone storage gets full.”

40. ​”Your mama so fat it took me a whole day to get to her good side.”

41. “Your mama so fat that when she walked in front of the TV, I missed two episodes.”

42. “Your mama so fat she jumped up and got stuck in the air.”

43. “Your mama so fat her carbon footprint turned to diamond.”

44. ​”Your mama so fat when she fell over, she rocked herself to sleep trying to get back up.”

45. ​”Your mama’s so fat she went out in high heels and came back in flip flops.

46. “​Your mama so fat that when she walked in front of the TV, I missed two episodes.”

47. “​Your mama so fat that her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.”

48. “​Your mama so fat when she steps on the scales it reads, “One at a time, please.”

49. “​Your mama so fat when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.”

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50. ​”Your mama so fat she doesn’t need an airplane to travel because she’s already worldwide.”

51. “Your mama so fat when she was buried, the flat earthers announced the earth is not flat anymore.”

52. “Your mama so fat she has more rolls than a bakery.”

53. “Your mama so fat her favorite game show is Wheel of Four Chins.”

54. “Your momma’s so fat, she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.”

55. “Your momma’s so fat, the aliens thought she was the mothership!”

Your Mama So Poor Jokes

56. “Your mama so poor, when I ring the doorbell, she yells: Ding Dong!”

57. “Yo momma is so poor she created a Gmail account just so she can eat the spam.”

58. “Your mama so poor your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk.”

59. “Your momma so poor she put penny candy on layaway.”

60. “Your mama is so poor that when someone tries to rob her, they go into debt.”

61. “Your mama so poor, she drives a Poor-shh!”

62. “Your mama is so poor she was in K-Mart with a box of Hefty bags. I said, “What ya doin’?” She said, “Buying luggage.”

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63. “Your mama is so poor she lives in a two-story Doritos bag with a dog named Chip!”

64. “Your mama so poor I spent the nite at your house and in the morning I asked your mama what’s for breakfast she put her foot on the table and said corn flakes!”

65. “Your momma so poor she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people’s fingers.”

66. “Your mama’s so poor the I saw her rolling a can and said what are you doing she said moving!”

67. “Your mama’s so poor, she took out a 2nd mortgage on her cardboard box.”

68. ” Your mama so cheap, instead of writing her mother a letter on stationery paper, she writes her letter on toilet paper.”

69. “Your mama is so poor that her breakfast is from my backyard bird feeders.”

70. “Your momma’s so poor I went to the park and stepped on a lit cigarette and she said “Who turned off the heat”!”

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Your Mama So Stupid Jokes

71. “Your momma so stupid, when she saw YMCA, she said, “Look, they spelled Macy’s wrong.”!”

72. “Your momma so stupid, that she failed a survey.”

73. “Your momma so stupid, that she thinks Nickleback is a refund.”

74. “Your mama is so stupid that she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.”

75. “Your momma so stupid she sits on the TV, and watches the couch!”

76. “Your mama is so stupid, that she thought Moby D!¢K was a S-xually transmitted disease.”

77. “Your momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car!”

78. “Your momma is so stupid that whenever someone rings the doorbell, she checks the microwave.”

79. “Your momma so stupid that she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.”

80. “Your momma so stupid that I saw her walking down the street yelling into an envelope, asked what she was doing, and she said sending a voice mail.”

81. “Your momma so stupid that she fell over wireless internet.”

82. “Your momma so stupid that she sat in a treehouse because she wanted to be a branch manager.”

83. “Your momma so stupid that she asked what army Colonel Sanders was in.”

84. “Your momma so stupid that when she broke her VCR, she bought a videotape on how to fix your VCR.”

85. “Your momma is so stupid that she sold her car for gas money!

86. “Your momma is so stupid that she can’t make Jello because she can’t fit 2 quarts of water in the box.”

87. “Your momma is so stupid that she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper!”

88. “Your momma so stupid that when she saw a “Wrong Way” sign in her rearview mirror, she turned around.”

89. “Your momma so stupid, she put a quarter in a parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out.”

90. “Your momma so stupid that she put on a coat to chew winter fresh gum.”

91. “Your momma so stupid when she went to Subway, she asked for a ticket to Chicago.”

92. “Your momma is so stupid when she took her dog to Pet Smart to get an IQ Test.”

  Observations on Life

93. “Your momma so stupid she went to Boost Mobile to fill up her nitro.”

94. “Your momma so stupid that she got locked in a Furniture store and slept on the floor.”

95. “Your momma is so stupid that it took her 9 months to come up with a joke!”

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Your Mama So Ugly Jokes

96. “Your momma so ugly, when the devil saw her, he started praying.”

97. “Your momma so ugly, they use her picture to scare kids straight.”

98. “Your momma so ugly, when we took her to the beautician, it took her 12 hours to get a quote!”

99. “Your momma so ugly, Lady Liberty blew her torch out so she wouldn’t have to see her.”

100. “Your momma so ugly, the mirror did not make a reflection.”

101. “Your momma so ugly, when she went in a haunted house, she came out with a job application.”

102. “Your momma so ugly, she fell into a gorilla exhibit and got shot.”

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103. “Your momma is so ugly, she’s the reason Sonic runs fast.”

104. “Your momma so ugly, daddy takes her to work with him so he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.”

105. “Your momma so ugly, when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming.”

106. “Your momma so ugly, when she tried to enter an ugly contest, but they said, “Sorry, no professionals.”

107. “Your momma so ugly, that the football team yelled at her to get out of the bus.”

108. “Your momma so ugly, that one direction went the other way.”

109. “Your momma so ugly, that people break in her house to close the curtains!”

110. “Your momma so ugly, that her memory foam wishes it could forget!”

111. “Your momma so ugly, that it took her 2 weeks to convince the zoo management she wasn’t a gorilla!”

112. “Your momma so ugly, that the Terminator said, “I won’t be back.”

113. “Your momma so ugly, she slapped herself and her face slapped her back.”

114. “Your momma so ugly, she entered a Miss America pageant and nearly lost her citizenship.”

115. “Your momma so ugly, I asked if her face hurt because it was killing me.”

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Did any of our “Your Mama Jokes” describe your mom? If so, no offense intended! Our only wish is that you get a hearty chuckle out of them! Heck, pass them along to your own mother and share the joy of laughter.

Should your mom ever seem a bit nagging, find that quiet place where you can kick back and review the list again. For those, you find especially amusing, keep them written down put upon your nightstand.