- We used to call it “recess.” Today they call it “cease fire.”
- The Bible Studies course has been recently changed to “Theories in Mass Hypnosis 101.” Surprisingly no one seems to have noticed.
- College would be great if it weren’t for all the classes.
- I’m failing geometry because I refuse to believe that pie are squared.
- Someone died of a brain aneurism today while taking a standardized test. The last thing anyone saw him do was stand up, pull all his hair out and yell, “ABACADABA!! ABACADABA!!!!”
- I think I’ll skip English tomorrow. There are just certain aspects of Moby I don’t want to know about.
- The school board decided to remove speech and debate from the course schedule; there was no argument.
- Our school is very low-budgeted; our physics book is so out of date the last chapter deals with combustion.
- School is just an elaborate plot by vampires to obtain the blood of teenagers through periodic blood-drives.
- Today in Art class we were going to paint a nude model, but the teacher sent her to the office for violating dress code.
- Fifth graders in Texas are using worms to recycle garbage from school lunches. But even the worms won’t eat the Salisbury steak.
- Today in English we learned absolutely nothing about killing mockingbirds.
- I went to a tough high school. In biology we used to dissect custodians.
- To be a first-grade teacher you have to have skill, dedication, and an immunity to knock-knock jokes.
- School is where you always try to do your best-except when your friends are watching.
- Teachers deserve a lot of credit. Of course, if we paid them more, they wouldn’t need it.
- Back-to-school sales get me all excited. Of course, pretty much any sale gets me all excited.
- School is very important. Everyone should get at least a high school education–even if they already know everything.
- You know our education system has problems when Hallmark comes out with a new line of “Easy-to-read” graduation cards.
- My kids have everything they need to go back to school—except the right attitude.
- The best part of going back to school is seeing all your friends. The worst part is that your teachers won’t let you talk to them.
- The Best College Jokes
- The Funniest Teacher Jokes
- The Wittiest Student Jokes
My name is Jay and I started this website to share my love of jokes, humor, all things comedy related, and comedians, including the up and coming ones you need to know about. Please feel to send me your suggestions and feedback through the contact form.