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The Funniest Social Worker Jokes

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Social Worker Jokes

Social workers are professionals who work with individuals and families to help them improve their quality of life. Social workers help people cope with problems, such as poverty, mental illness, or disability. They also provide support to people who need assistance in making choices about education, employment, and other aspects of life.

Social workers may work in a variety of settings such as schools, hospitals, community centers or prisons. Social workers typically have a bachelor’s degree in social work from an accredited college or university and must be licensed by the state in which they practice. These social worker jokes are very funny!


The Funniest Social Worker Jokes

We present the funniest social worker jokes – they include short one liner type of jokes and also longer story jokes. Enjoy!

One Liner and Short Social Worker Jokes

How many Recovered Memory Therapists does it take to change a light bulb?
No one knows for sure, but we all agree that some RMT therapists are changing light bulbs.

Should light bulb changers spend a lot of time and energy defending their profession?
No. Light bulb changers should boldly and courageously affirm what they choose.

Hear about the social work firing squad?
They stood in a circle.

How come they bury Social Workers 300 feet in the ground?
Deep down they are really good people.

In a perfect world, what question would a social worker ask of clients?
“Do you want fries with that?”

Also see: Hilarious jokes about psychiatrists and psychiatry


A social worker asks a colleague: “What time is it?”
The other one answers: “Sorry, don’t know, I have no watch.”
The first one: “Never mind! The main thing is that we talked about.

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The Mugger and the Social Worker

A social worker is facing a mugger with a gun.
“Your money or your life!” says the mugger.
“I’m sorry,” the social worker, answers, “I am a social worker, so I have no money and no life.”

How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb?

— The light bulb doesn’t need changing, it’s the system that needs to change.
— None. Social workers never change anything.
— None. The light bulb is not burnt out, it’s just differently lit.
— None. They set up a team to write a paper on coping with darkness.
— None. It’s not in our budget.
— None. It is no longer a reimbursable activity. You must first define the measurable outcome you are trying to achieve and get approval from the Community Mental Health Board.
— One. Can’t really tell you why, it just feels right.
— One. But you need letters of support from community social service agencies.
— Three. One to do the work, one to share the experience, and one to supervise and make sure that professional work is done.
— Five. One to screw it in, three to form the support group, and one to help with placement

Related: The funniest jokes about nurses and nursing

Longer Story Jokes about Social Workers

The Execution

A Jesuit psychiatrist, a holistic therapist, and a clinical social worker were caught up in an political/social action demonstration in a hostile Caribbean island nation run by a dictator which was once a Colonial possession of France. The three were sentenced to death by the guillotine.

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The Jesuit psychiatrist was chosen to be beheaded first. He asked that he lie face up so that he could look to the heavens and to God when he was beheaded. The executioner raised the blade as high as it went, then let it go. The blade stopped a few inches from his neck. The dictator’s guards believed that this was an omen from God, and let the psychiatrist go free.

The holistic therapist asked that he be beheaded face down, so that he could see mother earth so he could see at his last breath the source of all of his healing remedies. The executioner raised the blade as high as it went, then let it go. The blade stopped a few inches from his neck. The dictator’s guards believed that this was an omen from Mother Earth, and let the therapist go free.

When it came time for the clinical social worker to be beheaded, he said to the executioner, “I believe that I could help you with the problem of that dysfunctional blade — use a little oil, and don’t pull the blade all the way to the top! I’m sure i t would work better that way!”

Related: Hilarious jokes about psychology, psychologists and patients